Thursday, February 23, 2012

SURVIVOR: One World - Total Dysfunction

OK let's be real. No one likes Alicia, right? Her "If I saw her swimming in an ocean and she was drowning, I'd probably look the other way," line was not only a terribly poor imitation of Sue's original "if you were dying of thirst, I wouldn't give you a drink of water," speech, but it also made Alicia look like a completely heartless mean lady. But I'm sure she'll give us many more examples of that as the season goes on, assuming she stays (and these people always do).

So to the business of the game: the survivors had a "do-it-yourself" reward challenge where the prize is a tarp (in other words, Jeff wanted to sleep in that day). They basically have to untie the world's biggest braided knot and remove a ring. The men win. Sorry for not being more detailed about it, but the challenge itself wasn't very interesting. It just kinda happened, and that's that.

But what's so great is that the men set up their tarp (with no help from Colton) and declared that their camp is probably the "best camp in history." Alright then! Meanwhile, Colton spends Most of his time at the girls' camp and is literally building their shelter with them. But the ladies don't necessarily want him just hanging out all the time. He becomes a "virus they can't get rid of," and they kick him out, but he keeps coming back (hence the "can't get rid of" bit)!

Colton calls a meeting with the ladies and announces that he has determined, after 3 days of being in the island, that he has "no one here" and wants to know if he can just live at the girls' camp...

What is in the water on this island? Why are people so freaking crazy? Oh wait! Colton freaking just showing some of the guys his Immunity Idol! Why on earth??? (I'm watching as I type.) Five minutes ago, Colton had "no one," and now he has an alliance, of which he is the head.

Immunity Challenge this week is an interesting one. The survivors have to stand on a balance beam and walk across one-by-one, making sure not to knock any of the others off. The best part was that you could only ever touch one other person at a time. If you broke the rules, you have to jump in the water and start over. This challenge really revealed that the men work very well together and that Kat is a completely useless moron.
Kat literally jumped in the water twice just for the heck of it. No other reason at all! The men were able to complete the challenge entirely before the women were even able to get two people across the beam. Colton better seriously reconsider his ridiculous desire to be on their team.

So it's probably between Kat and Nina (or "the walking dead," as Sabrina describes her) tonight at Tribal.

I mean, I would say it's obvious that Kat will go home, but people on the island are stupid so there's a huge chance Nina will go home, even if it's only because of her constant use of the word "witless."

Tribal gets off to a good start. It's always fun when Jeff says that any tribe is the worst in Survivor history. Nina immediately goes after Kat, challenging her to a "Life Experience Duel." Nina brings 13 years on in the LAPD and Kat brings "I'm outdoors a lot and I work in sales." Not a good pitch, Kat. I'm not buying.

Alicia opens her mouth again. This time she says it's embarrassing for her because women at home can't root for their tribe after their performance at the immunity challenge. Interestingly enough, she doesn't seem to be at all embarrassed by her earlier confession that she would willingly let Kristina drown. Alright then.

So the women vote. Jeff speedily tallies them. And Nina is sent home! Another win for the women's tribe!

Maybe CBS just didn't show us what Nina did to rub everyone the wrong way? Or maybe the tribe is just stupid...

I guess time will tell! The thunderstorm next week looks like a doozy. Can't wait!

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